Before he died in 2009, the King of Pop Michael Jackson owned at least 10,000 books. No kidding. Ten thousand books. Why? How can one man possibly read 10,000 books in one lifetime? This was apart from newspapers and magazines, emails, SMS, song lyrics. Plus, Michael Jackson was no ordinary man.
She calls and says, “I just want to hear your voice.” But my reaction was a massive sigh. And then I say, “Thank God.” to which she responds: “Why, you missed me too?” “Well, yes. But that’t not why I said thank God.”
One time, when I was younger, Sola, a neighbour, told me about two of our other neighbours who might be sleeping together. Sola and I were teenagers — 13 or 14 at the time. “No way!” I said, my eyes like bulbs.
Books are not the only source of information and intelligence these days. If you read the Brain Pickings newsletter, for instance, you could find yourself gradually becoming a polymath.
I’m deeply honoured to be named to the grand jury of the New York Festivals Advertising Awards. Which is a super big deal.
Bankulli is a big man– when he stands beside my 5ft 9.5″ I feel he’s 7ft tall. But he also knows how to perfectly fade into the background. This is probably his superpower. He helps other people shine by staying out of their way.
“What’s the role of the brand in this ad!” “For crying out loud, where’s the product in use!” “Are you trying to tell me the brand isn’t the hero of this commercial!”
Being that this is a season of political appointments, some of us continue to pray someone somewhere puts forward our name for something in someone’s cabinet. I, for example, will take any appointment haha. Fingers crossed, ladies and gentlemen. Now, if you find yourself in charge of digital media for any governor or politician, come learn from Tunde Muraina. For eight years, he did this job for Senator Abiola Ajimobi, the immediate past governor of Oyo State and Tunde’s got nuggets to share. You’ll be surprised at some of the demands:
If not, why would Biggie stuff the new Big Brother Naija house with influencers and those with big family names? Oh wait. Is it why he nicknamed this set the Pepper Dem?
To tantalise, according to Google, is to tease. To torment. Now, why would anyone want to associate their restaurant to that punishing feeling?
The problem with the children my generation is currently unloading onto this world is that these lil’ buggers are going to have everything they want. Great things will just keep falling in their laps. Including cameras that will never require a roll of film.
This is a meme I saw on my WhatsApp Status today:
Yesterday I drove by Ahmadu Bello Way and looked to the right. The beach was no longer there! Wait, who removes a beach? The Bar Beach, aka Victoria Beach, was always the highpoint of Ahmadu Bello Way. You knew it was always there. But now it’s not.
There’s something called the Morning After Effect. Nope, it’s got nothing to do with alcohol nor does it refer to athletic sex. It’s totally about music. Yes we realise that music is like an addictive drug for some people and many sexual encounters do demand a fitting soundtrack. But, for this special episode of our life-disrupting discussions, let’s consider the Morning After Effect of Afropolitan Vibes.
Food is ready. Come inside. Point to the enormous cowtail dripping with a load of extra seasoned thick red stew. Demand a replacement for the ponmo that’s not as weighty as the one the Mama just served to that other man. Fufu? Pounded yam? Amala? Great. Take your seat. Wash your hands in the enormous plastic bowl being held out for you by a sublime beauty